Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Saint Valentine's Day

I really like Valentine's day and related festivities so I'm trying to revel in them without letting those Valentine nay-sayers bring me down (difficult task for a pisces!) People who hate Valentine's are lame. So lame they can only repeat the same three excuses which I now intent to eviscerate now.

1. "Valentine's is just a consumerist ploy based purely on the marketing evil-geniuses at Hallmark, Russel Stover and 1-800-flower."
Get a life. You can boycott consumerism and still make special effort to be grateful for all the love in your life - romantic or otherwise. Its a consumerist holiday because y'all are too damn lazy to be imaginative and creative to come up with an original and thoughtful gift that you make yourself. Dumbass.

2. "I'm loving and awesome all the time why should I be peer pressured into doing anything nice on this particular day?"
It is not an excuse that you show love other times of the year. Like Thanksgiving, you should be thankful all year, or mothers day, you should love your mom all year, but there's one day designated to make sure we take pause in our busy lives and make sure that those who matter to us know it and feel it, whether you show it with flowers and chocolate or a handmade card and a kiss. Plus - if that's your line of bullshit then I would wager you in fact are not as nice and sweet as you claim but are instead a prick.

3. "Valentine's day is lame because I have no mans"
LOVE is all around. You just can't see it because you're so focused on one kind.

4. The bottom line is that if it matters to your parter it should matter to you because S/HE matters. So whether or not you think flowers symbolize your feelings, you should take into consideration if s/he thinks flowers symbolize your feelings and do it for the sole fact that it will make her happy. Stop complaining and being selfish and annoying and do something for someone else. Or at least don't do it around me.

Happy Valentine's!

1 comment:

Kate's mom said...

That's my kid! Bravo!!