Monday, August 13, 2007

Procrastination is like masturbation


Someone was in my stall this morning in Hurtig. The other two had already been used. My stall, the seat is always up when I go to use it. I figure it's either just been cleaned and I'm the first, or a transvestite uses it before me. Either way it seems cleaner.

I used tampons for the first time in 4 months this weekend. I once thought that tampons were the end of all convenience in menstruation receptacles. I was very wrong. Being apart from it made me newly appreciate and fall in love all over again with my cup. Let's just say it was a good thing I was already wearing red, stained shorts.

I recommend V for Vendetta, but you must not just watch it as entertainment. It is social commentary on a dystopia reminiscent of 1984 and of our current society. If you'd like guidance in this reading, I will watch it with you.

I cut off the tip of my thumb (a very tiny piece) which got lost in the spinach which went into the soup which I have thus aptly named "Thumb Soup" - a variation on spinach, sausage and white bean soup. Everyone's all grossed out that we ate it, but really, it already had turkey flesh in it, why is that less gross than human flesh?

It's ironic that this summer it has been difficult for me to keep up blogging. It seems the more I do and consequently have to write about, the less time I have or am willing to sit down and document it. Perhaps I'm merely mimicking Derrida in my refusal to be confined to archives of arbitrary past "truth" and have exchanged it for moments of agency that can never be contained.

Shout out to Adina, 'cause cool people read my blog. Pay attention; people that read my blog are going to be a big deal - and you heard it here first.

They say life goes full circle, but if you can never go back then you're never at the place you started at. This summer I've reconnected with lost people and places from my past, but it's never going back home because I'm a different person in a different place than I was before. Perhaps we were meant to take this time in order to be able to appreciate what we have and have had. Boston wouldn't have held the lure that it did without NH, and I wouldn't appreciate the mountains and the stars of NH without the lights and cement of Boston. The relationships that I had before were doomed because I wasn't capable of what they required. Perhaps they were never doomed, but were hibernating until now I am. I wonder if the people that shaped who I've become ever regret not sticking around to see what that is. You're missing out. Maybe I wouldn't be this person if they had stuck around.

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